Disappointment

–noun

1.	the act or fact of disappointing

2.	the state or feeling of being disappointed

Disappointment sucks. I foung out about an hour ago that AFI (the best band in the world in my oppinion) are going to be playing at Reading and Leeds this August. The tickets are already sold out. :-( Bad times.

Maybe I wouldn't feel as dissapointed if this was the first time it happened, but unfortunatly it is the second. Hopefully it will not happen when AFI do a proper tour of the UK supporting their new album. So hopefully I will get to see them at some point.

...

The past couple of weeks have been really quite shit.
First, I get involved with a friend of mine to find out it is just a bit of fun, though I am beginning to think that I was some sort of delayed rebound.
And second, I found out that one of my cat's back home has ran off and hasn't been seen since. So yeah a pretty crap few weeks really.

It is so tempting to just curl up in a ball and sulk...

Doubt

doubt

   /daʊt/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [dout] Show IPA

–verb (used with object)

1.	to be uncertain about; consider questionable or unlikely; hesitate to believe.

2.	to distrust.

3.	Archaic. to fear; be apprehensive about.

–verb (used without object)

4.	to be uncertain about something; be undecided in opinion or belief.

–noun

5.	a feeling of uncertainty about the truth, reality, or nature of something.

6.

distrust.

7.	a state of affairs such as to occasion uncertainty.

8.	Obsolete. fear; dread.

Have you ever believed in something so completely, that you never thought that anything would make you doubt it? That has happened to me twice today; once with a good friend which started off as a joke and the second an off hand comment from a stranger.

Maybe I do take things a bit too seriously... maybe way too seriously in some cases. Or maybe I am just an emotional wreck at the moment, if I have ever been any thing else. Maybe I am the sort of person who is too caught up in the past and lies, trying to be someone I'm not. The thought of trying to find myself, it scares me so much, and for so many reasons. I mean, there has to be something I am hiding from, hasn't there? There has to be something that I am trying to avoid. I thought that it was stuff that happened with my dad, but I've delt with that. I'm sure I have. I just don't know what else it can be.